There is simply god awful and then there is this pos. WTH. This was intentional? Really makes me curious how much they lost in their budget. The whole $50 worth of it.
Garlic & Gunpowder
2017
Action / Comedy
Garlic & Gunpowder
2017
Action / Comedy
Plot summary
Sonny (Steven Chase) and Archie (James Duval) are two Mafia wise guys and "contractors" for a 300 pound, cigar chompin', obnoxious Mob Boss, 'Ma' (Felissa Rose). They shake down local business for "protection" and do the occasional contract killings or rival take-outs. A comet has the world in a panic; doomsday media pundits claim it's the end of the world but NASA says it's not gonna happen- it's just media hype. Sonny is rethinking his life; his time could be up whether the comet hits or not. Sonny's thinking marriage to a nice girl, maybe even kids and retire to a vineyard in Italy with his lifelong best buddy, Archie. Neither of them trust their boss and know Ma could rub them out once they are of no use to her anymore...maybe it's time to cash themselves out before Ma does. The world's top 1% aren't taking any chances. Big City's wealthy fat cats plan to stash their money, gold and valuables in mines in the rural mountains outside the city. A convoy will take the treasure there and Ma wants to hijack it. Barry Ling (Clint Jung) rival Chinese Mafia leader wants that convoy too. Sonny and Archie see an opportunity to hit this convoy, be rid of Ma and take their dream early retirement. Federal Agents Bean (Dean McDermott) and his boss, Agent Tracey (Martin Kove) see the same opportunity and more. They use Evvy (Judy Tenuta) a former Mafia moll as bait. She finds out that Bean and Tracey also plan to hit the convoy, apprehend Ma and Ling, which will cover for lifting some serious cash from the convoy. While they line their own pockets they are the heroes in an FBI sting operation known as "Garlic and Gunpowder." Even Mayor Brown (Vivica A. Fox) is on the take. Everyone has their plan for the heist...which one wins out? Do Sonny and Archie marry some "nice girls" and head to the Italian countryside or does the comet close it all down?
Uploaded by: FREEMAN
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OMG tragic
If you are l[ooking for a cute little popcorn movie, go somewhere else.
Hands down, this is the worst movie I have ever seen. Now, take into account that I'm 62 years old and a life long movie fan. I have seen a remake of "Plan 9 From Outer Space" which was worse than the original. I didn't't even think that that was possible. But Garlic And Gunpowder goes to an all time low. I'm not going to give any spoilers, but the acting was awful. Just the fact that Judy Tenuta was near top billing should give you an idea of how bad it was. The plot was preposterous. There were lots of sophomoric jokes. But even those were unfunny. The only reason that I gave it one star was because they wouldn't't let me give it zero stars.
Stop using "insurance business" in quotation marks when you talk about it.
The film focuses on Archie (James Duval) and Sonny (Steven Chase) two lovable Italian mobster cousins who live in "The Big City" (California) and work for Ma (Felissa Rose). They are in some sort of drug/turf war with the Chinese mob. A comet is headed toward Earth and the rich people want to move their accumulated wealth out of the city to an underground unit. The plan is to hijack the vehicles.
This is designed to be a crime-comedy spoof. At times it was humorous, but most of the time it tried too hard with bad writing such as the ballet scene. Michael Madsen and Vivica A. Fox have very small roles and are basically lending their names to the film.
The film uses slurs against blacks, Chinese, and Native Americans.
Guide F-word. No sex. Photo nudity on walls.